June 2013 Newsletter - Communication in the Workplace Part 1

Letter from the Editor

“Slow down and be.” This has been my mantra for the past several weeks. I even have a campaign happening on Twitter to spread the word (go to www.twitter.com/claysnelson to learn more about the #slowdownandbe campaign). And, I’m amazed at the number of people who have an almost negative, visceral reaction to the advice to “slow down.”  I’ve heard:

• “Slow down? I don’t have time to slow down!”
• “I have too much to do to slow down.”
• “If I slow down, I’ll never catch back up!”

The excuses go on and on, but my response always remains the same:

“But, what are you missing along the way?”

There is nothing wrong with going fast, but when you constantly move at mach speed, life is going to be somewhat blurry! What you’re missing could be:

• Being really present when your child gives you a hug.
• The solution to a problem you are busy trying to fix.
• An opportunity to make a difference where a difference desperately needs made!

You see, being busy is actually a great excuse for inaction or even avoidance. People say, “I don’t have time!” but when something happens in the world around us (to a loved one, etc), we make time to do what we are compelled to… we choose to be in action where we want to and make time for it. So, if you are being “too busy,” what are you hiding from?We all are guilty of getting caught up in the world around us and what we believe at any given moment needs our attention. So, what I’m really advocating when I say, “Slow down and be,” is that you take in the world around you. BE open to learning new things about the world and people around you, and even yourself! You just might discover that what you currently believe is so important and is keeping you busy, isn’t what you should be so busy at.

#slowdownandbe

For more tips and daily pointers, join me on Twitter for the #slowdownandbe campaign. You can also win a copy of my new book! To win just follow me on Twitter and tweet me with #slowdownandbe        

Remember to Have Fun

 The economic struggles that most businesses and households endured over the past several years has created an environment where we are running harder than ever to keep what we have. We’ve forgotten how to “slow down and be.” Yet, if we aren’t having any fun or taking care of ourselves, how can we expect to get great results?As a leader, your loved ones and business teams look to YOU to set the standard! If they see you running yourself to death, not eating right, not exercising, not taking care of YOU, and not having FUN, what do you think they will do? Eventually everyone on your team will be completely stressed and burned out, including yourself!You’ve got to remember to have fun! Otherwise, there is no point to all this hurry-scurry, anyway. Money can’t hug you. Your job can’t hug you!Fun, remember fun? There are lots of different ideas about what fun is. What’s yours?

• Laughing so hard your face hurts
• Taking a drive down a scenic road
• Holding a newborn baby
• Singing along with your favorite song
• Teeter-tottering with your child at the park
• Playing on your church’s basketball team
• Watching the gorillas at the zoo
• Savoring a special meal with all your favorite foods
• Using your binoculars at night to look at the stars
• Seeing old family movies from when you were a kid
• Going to a sporting event with your favorite team
• Building a sand castle

There are also many benefits from having more fun in your life. Engaging in fun activities promotes self-esteem, teamwork, physical and creative skills, friendships, and leadership skills. Health professionals tell us that having fun helps eliminate negative stress and physically active fun events can help prevent heart disease.And what about having fun while you work? Remember, there are no fun police, and life is what you make it. So why not make it fun? I dare you!

Communication in the Workplace - Part I

We all know that communication is challenging, and it can be especially difficult in the work environment, but why?We are all human beings. We have lives outside of the work we do, and separating our lives, our feelings and the people we are from the work we do simply isn’t doable. Meaning, that in the workplace not only are we dealing with the job we do, the people we work with, and those things we are accountable for, but we are also carrying around circumstances and issues from our lives outside of the work we do.Think about all of the things that each individual in the workplace potentially has going on in and around their lives: Family, bills to pay, kids to get to school, groceries to buy, dinner to make, health issues, homes to maintain, relationships to nurture, and on and on and on!!We all have our own personal “stuff” that we bring to the workplace, wants and needs that are far greater than the job we do, and our communications have to filter through all of the “non-work” things in order for communication to really get through! So, if we are so gripped by the stuff going on in our heads, how do we break through and become clear, concise, and honorable in our communications, in what we speak and in what we hear?

Step 1: Stop and think about who you are being.

Instead of being all about your own agenda – in a rush, giving short answers, and resorting to “Because I told you so”: slow down, think about how you are communicating, what you want to communicate and then communicate fully and completely why something is being done the way it is. Stay present to the question of: “Am I communicating so that what I’m saying can actually be heard or are the words I’m using, the tone of my voice or my body language in the way of the message getting through?”Remember: The speaker in any communication is responsible for what the recipient (listener) actually gets from the communication.

Step 2: Don’t assume anybody or anything!

Assumptions are a part of how all of us communicate. However, as Henry Winkler is quoted as having said, “Assumptions are the termites of relationships.” Assumptions get in the way of what is, and is not, real and create roadblocks to clear and complete communication! Assumptions turn a possibility into an “is” and in a split second an incorrect assumption can lead us down the wrong path!We assume those we work with can read our minds and then get angry and blame them when they fail to do so! We wrongly assume that everyone in the workplace knows how to do everything they need to know. So guess what? That means not only do you have to give up your assumptions and be clear about what your team does and doesn’t know how to do, but you are going to have to teach them what they don’t know!!

Step 3: Teach instead of Tell

The definition of Teach is: to cause to know something. The definition of Tell is: to order, or direct. When considering these two definitions, which one Teach vs. Tell do you think communicates most fully and completely?Obviously, when we take the time to teach and explain to our co-workers why we do something the way we do, the results will be much better than if we simply tell them what to do! Yet, in most instances we still default to TELLING those on our team what to do, and “Telling” doesn’t translate well into an action or way of being that is easily duplicated!Yes, teaching does require us to slow down and take the time to actually be the question instead of the answer. We have to take the time to really listen and find out what our team members would do if we weren’t there, and being the question – asking: “What would you do if I weren’t here” – instead of being the answer is how we learn what they don’t know and what we need to teach.

Step 4: Make sure you are not just heard, but understood too!

Make sure those around you understand what is being asked of them in terms of the job they are to do and by-when they are supposed to do it! Make sure what you intend to teach your team is what they are learning! As a leader, supervisor, or general team member in the workplace you have to not only know that what you are saying is being heard, but you have to make sure it is being understood too!Communication is a two way street and it does not have to be difficult. It does, however, require a conscious effort and commitment on the part of each team member to full and complete communication!Next month in Part 2 of Communication in the Workplace we’ll address the final steps for putting full and complete communication to work for you in the workplace.