August 2013 Newsletter - Taking Care of You

Letter from the EditorDear Friends,

Have you ever noticed that you often don’t have to understand the language someone is speaking in order to get what they are saying? For instance, you are in the stands watching a high school football game. There are people around you in every shape and size, young and old, English speaking and otherwise. There are grandparents cheering on their grandchildren. There are brothers and sisters cheering on their siblings. There are parents cheering on their children. There are even aunts and uncles cheering on their nephews.What is so cool about this is that no matter what language the cheering fans speak, it is clear what they are saying. All one has to do is look at the sparkle in their eyes, hear the sincerity in their voices, and really get the heartfelt way in which they are contributing to the team. And, what this so poignantly illustrates is this: Who we are being when we communicate bridges more people than the language we use to communicate.So, I ask you, what is your team really getting when you communicate with them? What does your family see in your eyes when you walk in the door and greet them? What does the stranger in the grocery store learn about you when you are standing next to them in line? It is something for all of us to think about, including me!Warm Regards,

Leadership Essential: Give Up Fearing Change

The note on the jar in the accompanying picture is rather clever… a play on words that clearly points out the truth that most of us fear change in our lives and the world around us. Yet, nothing ever stays the same.Our bodies change in even the smallest of ways each and every second we age. The seasons change. Our children grow and learn (changing as they go). The world changes; admittedly not always for the good, but it is change nonetheless. So, with all of this change around us, you’d think we would be used to change by now… figured out how to manage it… and stopped fearing the change in our lives. Yet, just as the jar in the picture indicates, we still fear change… run from it… attempt to compartmentalize it in an effort to keep it at bay! And, for all of the effort, we get a giant lump of change (stored in a "jar") that we never utilize to our fullest advantage; we know it's there, we count it, track it, and yet, we push it aside to the point that it weighs us down.

What is it about change that frightens us so much?

Change in and around our world requires us to change with it, when we'd much rather stay comfortable, feet firmly planted, in what we know. Being with the unknown—doing things that are new and even slightly out of our comfort zones—is difficult for most people, but to manage change successfully you have to learn and grow with it. And you do that by embracing the change that comes your way. Leave your FEAR (not change) in the jar!If you attempt to control, compartmentalize, bury, or even accumulate change, you risk completely missing out on the opportunity that change brings you. Does that mean change is always easy? Of course not! Change is weighty, but it is also valuable. It has worth and when you use change as a means to learn and grow, you open up a whole new world of possibility.As W.E.B. DuBois said, "The most important thing to remember is this: To be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become."

Taking Care of You

We know others who are “burning the candle at both ends,” but recognizing it in ourselves can be a bit more difficult. We excuse our frantic busyness as necessary or normal, when it really isn’t. Check it out.

• Do you spend more time working on the weekends than laughing and having fun?
• Do you often fail to be your word when it comes to personal commitments, using work as an excuse?
• Are you unhappy doing what you are doing?
• Are you out of shape physically?
• Do you let work take away from participating in activities that you love to do?
• Do you do everything yourself?
• Do you frequently check your e-mail or voicemail when you are away from the office?
• Are you mentally and physically exhausted at the end of your work day?
• Do you allow work to dominate everything else in your life?

If you truthfully answered “yes” to two or more of these, you may want to consider the toll this lopsided way of being can take on you and those you love, and what you can do to change it!  Now, being out of balance doesn’t mean you are a bad person, but it does mean that you are missing out on the fun of living your life and having relationships with those you love!  And the cold hard truth is, every second that you give up fun and being with your family for your job and your business is a second you can’t ever get back. So, what can you do to make your life a priority and ultimately have a more fulfilling professional life too?

Work/Life Balance Key #1: Commitment

You may think that the “concept” of living a happier more fulfilled life sounds good, but can’t imagine where the time to have that much fun and manage your business will come from. However, the truth is that time for both your life and business comes from: 1) the increased energy taking care of you provides, 2) from your commitment, and 3) your happier, more can-do attitude! So, give up wondering how you are going to do it, and commit to you! Whenever you commit to something you really, really want, the how will always show up.

Work/Life Balance Key #2: Personal Planning and Accountability

If your default way of living is to work, work, work and you want to reverse the downward trend, what has to be put in place in order to change the way you operate?  A written personal plan that helps you take care of YOU and a team that you allow to hold you accountable for following your plan! (In next month’s newsletter we’ll share the steps to creating and living a Personal Plan.)

Work/Life Balance Key #3: Team

Like any person who takes on a commitment to tackle an enormous physical challenge or to move on from their past, you need a team that supports you and holds you accountable for taking care of you.  You also need a team that supports you in achieving the goals you set for your business so that you can take time away to take care of you.

Work/Life Balance Key #4: Leadership

Keep your eye on the big picture – be the visionary you are paid to be – and allow your team to manage the rest. Become the question and stop being the answer! By asking questions that require your team to create solutions themselves, you are teaching them to think.  In the end, this simple shift in who you are being (the question vs. the answer) will allow you to stay focused on the big picture and your team to grow into players who can carry your business forward regardless of where you are or what you are doing.Your business.  Your Life.  Create a balance between the two doesn’t have to be hard!  However, you have to make the commitment to writing and following your personal plan.  Only you can ask for help and delegate to your team.  Only you can give up being the answer.  Only you can make the choice to make YOU a priority! So, as you contemplate your choices, remember, you are the only person who has a say in how your life turns out!